Recently, someone asked if I was married. I replied, "No". Since this was someone I couldn't go into personal details with, I couldn't reply with my usual "No, but we've been dating almost 7 years, lived together 5 of those years" so I left it at that. To which the person tells me "you don't understand yet- you will when you get married".
Wait a minute. What don't I understand? It really got me thinking. Sure, we aren't married yet- I get that. There is a whole other level of commitment and I don't mean to devalue marriage in any way. But to assume I don't "understand it"? I'm not sure what that means.
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| photo credit: Michael Maiatico |
So, here's what I do understand.
I understand faithfulness and loyalty.
I understand making my boyfriend a priority.
I understand the need for communication.
I understand compromise.
I understand caring for each other when one is sick.
I understand the balance of spending time together vs. spending time with others.
I understand the difficulties of managing several households on holidays.
I understand having inside jokes that no one else in the world would ever understand.
I understand the desire to want to start a family with this person.
I understand wanting to be with this person for the rest of my life.
I understand being so mad at someone and loving them so much at the same time.
I understand what it's like to go through some of the most difficult times imaginable and have this person by my side, supporting me no matter what. I understand that I do the same for him.
I'm sure I (we) have a lot to learn. I know marriage will open up a whole new set of doors.
But I would say that I think I understand pretty well.